Nobody should force you to come out! 

Domestic abuse is rarely discussed in the LGBTQ community, and you may not have thought that it happens in LGBTQ couples.

However,1:4 victims of domestic abuse are from same sex relationships.

Sadly they are even less likely to come forward to say something or seek help

then their male or straight counterparts. Many fear that they won't be believed,

they may be embarrassed, or they they may be scared. Sometimes someone's

sexuality is used against them especially if they have not come out to friends and

family, this may be used to blackmail or control the person to doing what their

partner wants rather then what is right for them.

Often an abusive partner will make excuses for their actions and even blame you

for their behaviour. They may also make light of the abuse or tell you that this is

what it is like to be in a LGBT relationship leaving you feeling confused. This is how

they want you to feel. You never deserve to be abused and you are never to blame

for the abuse.

Signs of domestic abuse

Ask yourself some of the following questions. You may experience one or all of them and even if you feel you only experience one on a regular basis this can still be domestic abuse and you can get help.

  • Are you ever afraid of your partner?
  • Do you feel like you’re walking on egg shells around your partner?
  • Does your partner ever threaten to ‘out’ you to your friends, family or colleagues?
  • Do they act in a negative way about your sexual orientation or gender identity?
  • Do they ever tell you you’re not a real lesbian, gay or bisexual person?
  • Do they ever tell you you’re not a real man or woman?
  • Do they ever hit you or threaten to hit you?
  • Do they ridicule you and/or make comments about your body?
  • Are you ever forced to have sex or engage in sexual acts that you don’t want to do?
  • Do they ever prevent you from engaging with the LGBT ‘scene’?
  • Do they control your finances or check up on what you spend your money on?


If any of these seem familiar or you are worried you may be in an abusive situation then end the silence and seek support and help. You can contact any help line but Galop offer a more specialist service for LGBTQ community.


Galop- LGBT Domestic Abuse Helpline


0300 999 5428 or 0800 9995428

Opening Times:

10am – 8pm Monday
10am – 5pm Tuesday
10am – 5pm Wednesday
10am – 8pm Thursday
1pm – 5pm Friday
(1pm – 5pm Tuesday is trans specific service).

For further information, please contact


This information is up to date as of 28th March 2019 and will not be updated soon